The Potbelly Pixie

Black Hair Girl #3

One of a series of three cards for a Black & White swap I'm doing.  Ink, watercolor, gel pen.

Sophia

This card is a stylized portrait of my friend Sarah's daughter, Sophia.  Yet another use for artist trading cards:  Sarah is collecting them from her artist friends and will be using them to redecorate Sophia's room!

Colored pencil.

Bunnyfly

For kysunflower, who loves bunny rabbits and dragonflies.

My original digital collage of bunnyfly, pasted to painted & stamped background, with paper, embossing, and hand-drawn accents.

You Have Freedom

Digital collage; open edition.  Prints available.  Please contact me! :)

New Altered Rolo

For Paben...

Hi again!

I'm back after spending the last two weeks immersed in my boys, who were back with me after spending several weeks, far out of town, with their father, where he lives.  The first week we had endless sleepovers, lots of yummy food, movies galore (both rented and at the theater), and hugs for mom, who had missed them so much.   And the second week we packed up the entire family (Tim, Zack, Toby, Noah, Shel) and Zack's friend, James, and headed to Las Vegas, Nevada.  Tim and I found it so fun and different when there recently for IDEX that we thought it would make a terrific family trip.

We did so many wonderful things, from shows (including PHANTOM OF THE OPERA and KA, by Cirque du Soleil), to attractions (no less than three roller coasters, and lunch atop the Stratosphere, where we had a gorgeous view of the entire Las Vegas area.)  I've been busy for days, ever since our return, sorting and editing nearly 400 photos we took while there for six days and five nights. I'm using Picaboo to create a hardbound photo book, which I'll have printed as a keepsake for our family, and can share online, too, with family and friends -- that part, for free!  We'll print a copy for James, as well.  I'll let you know how it turns out as this is the first time I'm using them.  Looks promising!

I've been trying to catch up on some art cards due, as well as a huge pile of eMail and snail mail (bills -- aargh!) that arrived in my absence.  It amazes me, how much mail I get, given that I'm mostly an at-home mom.

I'm also busy imagineering the final details on two new Boyds prototypes and a piece for Mindy Kinsey's 12 Days of Christmas editorial to run in Teddy Bear & Friends this holiday season.

So if you're waiting on mail from me, or wanting to know why I don't have bears for sale at this time, or just plain wondering where the heck I've been, I hope this fills in some blanks.

To those of you who responded with such heartfelt comments to my "real job" post, below... you have my thanks for your compassion and understanding.  It's so good to be heard.

:)

Dammit, and for the last time... I do have a "real" job!

I have a job. 

And, dammit... It's a "real" job.

I work as an artist.  And, as an artist, I'm tired of being considered the illegitimate, second-class, also-ran, when compared with others who supposedly have "real" -- read: stable, safe, secure, traditional -- jobs.

I spend many, many hours at a time in my studio -- where, if I did not have a "real" job, I wouldn't spend any time at all -- to create and produce a tangible product.   I photograph, advertise, auction, brand, market, package, and ship that product to my customers.  I maintain a website and a blog, an instructive Squidoo lens, and a constant presence as a forum moderator, in support of my "real" job and the product I create.  I enter -- and sometimes, win -- contests within my industry group.  These are "real" contests that "real" people in my "real" industry enter alongside me.  I participate in these competitions to keep my skills sharp and competitive, because I recognize that I live in a free-market economy of supply and demand.  Just like other "real" business people recognize.

I'm more fortunate than most, in that the hours I set for my work are of my own choosing.  But I DO work those hours, just like any employed person with a "real" job does.  I don't pretend to work those hours.  There are no elves or Celtic fae assembling  my product as a favor to me,  in recognition of our shared Irish ancestry.  Any work that gets done, gets done by me, and only me, during those hours spent in my studio.  Any product created is created by me, and only me, in that studio...my  "office," if you will.  The office where I go to work.  At my job.  My REAL job.

I'm an artist by trade, at this juncture in my life.  It's been a wonderful journey, but it's certainly a roller coaster.  My passion for creating waxes and wanes as does my income.  But it's cyclical, and what goes around, always comes around.

Sometimes I'm prolific with my craft and can earn thousands -- yes, thousands plural, with an "s" at the end -- per month for my efforts. Those in-the-black periods are a luxury and a reward, and as stress-free as self-employment gets.  Bliss!

Other times, I indulge my hedonistic (and family-centered) self with personal pursuits,  living outside the typical employment box by working not diligently, but instead sporadically, at a snail's pace.  At those times,  richer interests capture my attention.  Recognizing that life is lived but once, I embrace those opportunities to be fully present with my children and husband; to travel, and simply breathe, and be.  I can make more bears later -- in the wee hours of tonight; on the weekend, when other people don't even have the option of working their hours.  For now -- in those indulgent moments -- I will simply dive headfirst into life beautiful.

The fact that one month I'm a princess, and the next, a pauper, or that one season I love bearmaking, and the next it's more arduous and less inspiring, doesn't remotely alter the fact that my job is "real."  There are many, many jobs where income rises and falls with the tides.  What comes immediately to mind?  Commission-based sales jobs, for example.  From college-student cold-callers to high powered real estate agents, holders of these jobs skirt safe, fixed, regular income and instead rely on luck, chance, and talent to get their financial ends to meet.  Sometimes, meet they do; sometimes, meet they do NOT.  Are commission-based jobs less "real," because the people who hold those job have income that varies?  Is a real estate agent working at a job that's not "real" because his paycheck is uncertain? 

Is it reliable, safe income that describes a "real" job?  Or maybe is it working all day, every day, for 40 hours a week?  Does SHOWING UP, EVERY DAY, FULL TIME describe a "real" job?

If that's the case, no actor or actress has ever held a "real" job.  Those folks never know when the next "Friends" or "Lord of the Rings" will come along... if ever.  Some go years between acting jobs.  For those who tide themselves over with waitressing between parts, it's easy to look at their years off and say, "Well, of course she's waitressing.  For her, acting isn't her REAL job."

But for someone like Julia Roberts, who took several years off to birth and raise her children, can we fairly say that, "Julia took two years off and hasn't had a paycheck in that entire time.  Obviously, acting isn't her REAL job."  ???  The woman has an Oscar and I think we all know acting is most certainly her "real" job. 

I don't believe  for a second that the amount of hours a person works, per week or per year, determine what makes a  job "real"... or not real.   Likewise, I reject the notion that one's income is what defines a job as "real." 

Mother Teresa lived in, and beside, poverty all her adult life.  Who among you would dare call her life's charitable work, not "real," based on her income level.  Hopefully, not a one of you.

I pay taxes, like all people with "real" jobs do.  Because I'm self-employed, the California State Board of Equalization gets a chunk of my earnings each year.  I fill out profit/loss statements, or rather my accountant does, on my behalf, each year.  These profit/loss statements follow the same format, contain the same categories, as any business's form does.  And just like every other business, whether Joe's Corner Liquor Stop or Microsoft, Inc., my taxes are due at a certain time each year, paid in full, or I incur penalties.  That's because I have a "real" job; the tax laws apply to me the same as they apply to everyone else who is employed.   California and Uncle Sam grab a chunk of my earnings each year, too.  Because, since I am an employed person, with a "real" job, the law says theymust  get their share.

I have customers.  How would it be possible for me to have customers, and a mailing list numbering in the many hundreds, a large number of subscribers having purchased my work, if my job as an artist weren't "real?"  Do imaginary jobs garner customer lists and blog visitors?

AARGH!

Put most simply, I'm fed up.  I'm mad as hell about these insipid, insensitive presumptions and conclusions... and I don't want to take it any more.

Somewhere along the way, in polite, 1st-world society, in some contexts -- like in the midst of family discussions, for example (are you listening, dad?) -- it has become acceptable to dismiss the passion,  effort, and extremely real, measurable work of artisans, diminshing both their person and their product by focusing on the sometimes spotty nature of their income (lots of "real" jobs have spotty income!) and the sometimes fickle tastes of their customers (lots of "real" jobs sell trendy, flash-in-the-pan, products.) 

Inexcusably, it has become acceptable and commonplace to study the artisan and his creations and say, "Well, gee... Your work is pretty and all.  And you have talent and everything.  But of course, being an artist isn't a real job, now, is it?"

AARGH!  AARGH!  AARGH!

I can speak only for myself on these points.

• My art pays my bills.  Big bills, sometimes. 
• My art takes my family on vacation.   
• My art earns me flights to places previously unknown, paid for by someone else's Billing department.
• My art inspires licensing partnerships.
• My art has been a bridge to friendships on every continent.
• My art allows me to mingle with like-minded peers who understand my unique passions and craft business issues.
• My art has been published.  Repeatedly.  Internationally.
• My art garners notice, praise, reknown -- and even, sometimes, enemies.  Success inspires some and threatens others, it turns out.
• My art makes people feel safe and loved.  In short, it makes people HAPPY.
• My art, more than anything else, feeds my soul.

If that wonderful, heady, heart-filling stuff's not "real"...

... honestly, I don't know what is.

I have a job. As an artisan.  It's a "real" job.  It's not safe or reliable or consistent or rich-making.  I don't work a 40 hour week and I pay my own benefits.  But it's the happiest, best thing I've ever done in my life, next to motherhood.  And I know in my gut it's a more soul-feeding, self-propelled, lifestyle-serving job than 99% of the world ever gets a chance to experience. I am incredibly lucky, and so proud of myself for having created this opportunity for myself out of thin air, hard work, and a tireless desire to do good for myself and others. 

Where is the down side of that?

Why am I supposed to feel irresponsible?... flaky?... immature?... at risk?... flawed?... inferior?... when compared to a high-school dropout burger flipper at McDonalds.  Simply because that burger flipper has a steady income (albeit, at minimum wage) and works a set schedule, day in and day out, with benefits??  Am I supposed to feel subordinate to, or lesser than, that burger flipper, who hates his job and dreams only of the kind of freedom I am so fortunate to have not found, but CREATED, for myself??

Why should I feel lowbrow and lesser than, for being self employed, and proud of the opportunities I've created for myself... excited about the freedom my lifestyle affords me?   I may not be able to live this way forever, but it suits me, and it WORKS for me, for now.  I can saturate myself in my precious children while they are still relatively young and at home, and I'm privileged to be able to support myself and my family doing something -- prolifically or sporadically, well-paid or just scraping by -- that I truly love. 

How on earth am I supposed to make sense of the mindsets out there which tell me that, while these values of mine are interesting, it would really be "better" for me and my family, in the long run, if I just took a job -- any job -- that had me working 40 hours, with dental and medical, for no better reason than because that scenario, unlike my current circumstance, would be PREDICTABLE and SAFE.

???

Puh-lease.

Here's my final word on the subject.  To those of you lacking imagination, a clear instruction:   Stop telling me my job isn't "real."  It's as real as your job is... or was.  It's as real as your envy, and your projections about what my life must feel  like, because you're in touch with what YOUR life might feel like, if you were in my shoes.  My job is as real as your rigid thinking, and your judgement.  And your unwillingness to tolerate and accept a version of working life that differs from your own.

My job is as real as your inability to let go of your own fears; fears about what a life like mine feels like from the inside.   I know how it feels, because I'm living it.  It's not entirely solid, financially, and it may not last forever.  I'm not eyes-shut on this stuff, you know.

What my life IS, though, is  soul-enriching.  Being an artist makes me happy.  Being a self-representing artist is YES scary, and YES, fiscally unsafe.  But it's nothing short of joyful.  Any way you slice it.

I wish those of you who believe art isn't a "real" job could experience, even just for one brief moment, that kind of vivid, soul-deep, joy.

Until you do, I'll continue shouting AARGH, and you'll continue holding my freedom and spontaneity against me.  But at least, after this manifesto rant, I'll have had my say.

ba'-bee

A new digital art card.  Prints available.  Visit my "available work" gallery at ATCards.com to get one!

Three altered Rolos

... for an altered Rolodex swap.

Altered shoe

An altered shoe, for a non-card art swap at ATCards.com.  This was a very fun, but very messy, project.  I used fabric, patterned paper, tissue, lace & ribbon, paint, rubber stamps, ink, and collage, using matte gel medium to adhere it all.