Dammit, and for the last time... I do have a "real" job!

I have a job. 

And, dammit... It's a "real" job.

I work as an artist.  And, as an artist, I'm tired of being considered the illegitimate, second-class, also-ran, when compared with others who supposedly have "real" -- read: stable, safe, secure, traditional -- jobs.

I spend many, many hours at a time in my studio -- where, if I did not have a "real" job, I wouldn't spend any time at all -- to create and produce a tangible product.   I photograph, advertise, auction, brand, market, package, and ship that product to my customers.  I maintain a website and a blog, an instructive Squidoo lens, and a constant presence as a forum moderator, in support of my "real" job and the product I create.  I enter -- and sometimes, win -- contests within my industry group.  These are "real" contests that "real" people in my "real" industry enter alongside me.  I participate in these competitions to keep my skills sharp and competitive, because I recognize that I live in a free-market economy of supply and demand.  Just like other "real" business people recognize.

I'm more fortunate than most, in that the hours I set for my work are of my own choosing.  But I DO work those hours, just like any employed person with a "real" job does.  I don't pretend to work those hours.  There are no elves or Celtic fae assembling  my product as a favor to me,  in recognition of our shared Irish ancestry.  Any work that gets done, gets done by me, and only me, during those hours spent in my studio.  Any product created is created by me, and only me, in that studio...my  "office," if you will.  The office where I go to work.  At my job.  My REAL job.

I'm an artist by trade, at this juncture in my life.  It's been a wonderful journey, but it's certainly a roller coaster.  My passion for creating waxes and wanes as does my income.  But it's cyclical, and what goes around, always comes around.

Sometimes I'm prolific with my craft and can earn thousands -- yes, thousands plural, with an "s" at the end -- per month for my efforts. Those in-the-black periods are a luxury and a reward, and as stress-free as self-employment gets.  Bliss!

Other times, I indulge my hedonistic (and family-centered) self with personal pursuits,  living outside the typical employment box by working not diligently, but instead sporadically, at a snail's pace.  At those times,  richer interests capture my attention.  Recognizing that life is lived but once, I embrace those opportunities to be fully present with my children and husband; to travel, and simply breathe, and be.  I can make more bears later -- in the wee hours of tonight; on the weekend, when other people don't even have the option of working their hours.  For now -- in those indulgent moments -- I will simply dive headfirst into life beautiful.

The fact that one month I'm a princess, and the next, a pauper, or that one season I love bearmaking, and the next it's more arduous and less inspiring, doesn't remotely alter the fact that my job is "real."  There are many, many jobs where income rises and falls with the tides.  What comes immediately to mind?  Commission-based sales jobs, for example.  From college-student cold-callers to high powered real estate agents, holders of these jobs skirt safe, fixed, regular income and instead rely on luck, chance, and talent to get their financial ends to meet.  Sometimes, meet they do; sometimes, meet they do NOT.  Are commission-based jobs less "real," because the people who hold those job have income that varies?  Is a real estate agent working at a job that's not "real" because his paycheck is uncertain? 

Is it reliable, safe income that describes a "real" job?  Or maybe is it working all day, every day, for 40 hours a week?  Does SHOWING UP, EVERY DAY, FULL TIME describe a "real" job?

If that's the case, no actor or actress has ever held a "real" job.  Those folks never know when the next "Friends" or "Lord of the Rings" will come along... if ever.  Some go years between acting jobs.  For those who tide themselves over with waitressing between parts, it's easy to look at their years off and say, "Well, of course she's waitressing.  For her, acting isn't her REAL job."

But for someone like Julia Roberts, who took several years off to birth and raise her children, can we fairly say that, "Julia took two years off and hasn't had a paycheck in that entire time.  Obviously, acting isn't her REAL job."  ???  The woman has an Oscar and I think we all know acting is most certainly her "real" job. 

I don't believe  for a second that the amount of hours a person works, per week or per year, determine what makes a  job "real"... or not real.   Likewise, I reject the notion that one's income is what defines a job as "real." 

Mother Teresa lived in, and beside, poverty all her adult life.  Who among you would dare call her life's charitable work, not "real," based on her income level.  Hopefully, not a one of you.

I pay taxes, like all people with "real" jobs do.  Because I'm self-employed, the California State Board of Equalization gets a chunk of my earnings each year.  I fill out profit/loss statements, or rather my accountant does, on my behalf, each year.  These profit/loss statements follow the same format, contain the same categories, as any business's form does.  And just like every other business, whether Joe's Corner Liquor Stop or Microsoft, Inc., my taxes are due at a certain time each year, paid in full, or I incur penalties.  That's because I have a "real" job; the tax laws apply to me the same as they apply to everyone else who is employed.   California and Uncle Sam grab a chunk of my earnings each year, too.  Because, since I am an employed person, with a "real" job, the law says theymust  get their share.

I have customers.  How would it be possible for me to have customers, and a mailing list numbering in the many hundreds, a large number of subscribers having purchased my work, if my job as an artist weren't "real?"  Do imaginary jobs garner customer lists and blog visitors?

AARGH!

Put most simply, I'm fed up.  I'm mad as hell about these insipid, insensitive presumptions and conclusions... and I don't want to take it any more.

Somewhere along the way, in polite, 1st-world society, in some contexts -- like in the midst of family discussions, for example (are you listening, dad?) -- it has become acceptable to dismiss the passion,  effort, and extremely real, measurable work of artisans, diminshing both their person and their product by focusing on the sometimes spotty nature of their income (lots of "real" jobs have spotty income!) and the sometimes fickle tastes of their customers (lots of "real" jobs sell trendy, flash-in-the-pan, products.) 

Inexcusably, it has become acceptable and commonplace to study the artisan and his creations and say, "Well, gee... Your work is pretty and all.  And you have talent and everything.  But of course, being an artist isn't a real job, now, is it?"

AARGH!  AARGH!  AARGH!

I can speak only for myself on these points.

• My art pays my bills.  Big bills, sometimes. 
• My art takes my family on vacation.   
• My art earns me flights to places previously unknown, paid for by someone else's Billing department.
• My art inspires licensing partnerships.
• My art has been a bridge to friendships on every continent.
• My art allows me to mingle with like-minded peers who understand my unique passions and craft business issues.
• My art has been published.  Repeatedly.  Internationally.
• My art garners notice, praise, reknown -- and even, sometimes, enemies.  Success inspires some and threatens others, it turns out.
• My art makes people feel safe and loved.  In short, it makes people HAPPY.
• My art, more than anything else, feeds my soul.

If that wonderful, heady, heart-filling stuff's not "real"...

... honestly, I don't know what is.

I have a job. As an artisan.  It's a "real" job.  It's not safe or reliable or consistent or rich-making.  I don't work a 40 hour week and I pay my own benefits.  But it's the happiest, best thing I've ever done in my life, next to motherhood.  And I know in my gut it's a more soul-feeding, self-propelled, lifestyle-serving job than 99% of the world ever gets a chance to experience. I am incredibly lucky, and so proud of myself for having created this opportunity for myself out of thin air, hard work, and a tireless desire to do good for myself and others. 

Where is the down side of that?

Why am I supposed to feel irresponsible?... flaky?... immature?... at risk?... flawed?... inferior?... when compared to a high-school dropout burger flipper at McDonalds.  Simply because that burger flipper has a steady income (albeit, at minimum wage) and works a set schedule, day in and day out, with benefits??  Am I supposed to feel subordinate to, or lesser than, that burger flipper, who hates his job and dreams only of the kind of freedom I am so fortunate to have not found, but CREATED, for myself??

Why should I feel lowbrow and lesser than, for being self employed, and proud of the opportunities I've created for myself... excited about the freedom my lifestyle affords me?   I may not be able to live this way forever, but it suits me, and it WORKS for me, for now.  I can saturate myself in my precious children while they are still relatively young and at home, and I'm privileged to be able to support myself and my family doing something -- prolifically or sporadically, well-paid or just scraping by -- that I truly love. 

How on earth am I supposed to make sense of the mindsets out there which tell me that, while these values of mine are interesting, it would really be "better" for me and my family, in the long run, if I just took a job -- any job -- that had me working 40 hours, with dental and medical, for no better reason than because that scenario, unlike my current circumstance, would be PREDICTABLE and SAFE.

???

Puh-lease.

Here's my final word on the subject.  To those of you lacking imagination, a clear instruction:   Stop telling me my job isn't "real."  It's as real as your job is... or was.  It's as real as your envy, and your projections about what my life must feel  like, because you're in touch with what YOUR life might feel like, if you were in my shoes.  My job is as real as your rigid thinking, and your judgement.  And your unwillingness to tolerate and accept a version of working life that differs from your own.

My job is as real as your inability to let go of your own fears; fears about what a life like mine feels like from the inside.   I know how it feels, because I'm living it.  It's not entirely solid, financially, and it may not last forever.  I'm not eyes-shut on this stuff, you know.

What my life IS, though, is  soul-enriching.  Being an artist makes me happy.  Being a self-representing artist is YES scary, and YES, fiscally unsafe.  But it's nothing short of joyful.  Any way you slice it.

I wish those of you who believe art isn't a "real" job could experience, even just for one brief moment, that kind of vivid, soul-deep, joy.

Until you do, I'll continue shouting AARGH, and you'll continue holding my freedom and spontaneity against me.  But at least, after this manifesto rant, I'll have had my say.

Comments

[BRUINWERKS]

You go girl! I'm not sure who pee'd in your cornflakes and brought on this rant but I bet it felt great to get it out.
At the end of the day, if you are satisfied - its enough.

Cheryl

[Catherine L Owen]

amen to that :-)
i to have a PROPPER job, cough, :-)
may we link to each others blogs?
cat xxxx

[Veronica]

Yeh Shelli ...I agree
...but.. I will bet you dollars to doughnuts that those who should be reading this thoroughly will likely just give it a cursory glance (as people must do when they see they may have made a mistake, or also do when they truly don't "get it" at all) ... and then go their merry way (or probably more UN merry, as it were)... but still manage to put their own spin on your words.... and carry right on insulting you at the dinner table.

Try not to let it get to you.... enjoy the life you have forged for yourself and continue making beautiful art and beautiful effort. I love that you are so passionate and so persevering!!

[Chrissi]

Good for you Shel.
I'll tell you what, I've never felt better than when I watched Miss Potter. An artist, only the top selling children's author EVER, who's work was totally under appreciated and even demeaned by those around her. Her own mother not truly "seeing" her work and all of the utter joy it possessed. Several lines of that movie ring similar to what you've written here...like when her unsupportive mother asks..." and just how are you going to pay for this farmhouse" and her father replies "our daughter is famous, you're the only person who doesn't know it". Myself I'm very lucky in that my family truly values what I do and they support it in the best ways possible. The world outside of my supportive family is another thing. My work ethic has not diminished from when I was an office manager. I'm the same "exceeds expectations" performer at heart and in work ethic. I AM the productive departments of accounting, communications, community relations, shipping/receiving, mail services, marketing, information technology, quality assurance, operations, and sales all wrapped into one being....and so are you... and that deserves respect. If people out there can't handle our way of working, well that's their own (very odd) issue to address. Welcome to 2007 where every person out there dreams of the idea of "be your own boss....make your own schedule". Shoot, major corporations are hiring work at home customer service reps who will work the hours they want, when they want. A perfect solution for work at home mom's or other's who need that flexible schedule. But is sitting at home in front of a PC answering the phone for Macy's or Bank of America consumers more acceptable a concept than productive home based artist? I feel sad, very sad for the person who thinks so....how sad and small their world must be.
I'm not a big Billy Joel fan by any means, but musicians and artists are soul mates of sorts. His quote here is a good one. "This is a real job - as real as a doctor, a teacher, or a scientist-and just as important as and very similar to healing, teaching and inventing." I've seen you teach, heal and invent. What you do and have done is more REAL than any crappy corporate spreadsheet or graph that holds no real passion or real point frankly! Did a preview and I have talked WAY too much...forgive me -blushing-
HUGS!
Chrissi :)

[Ellen Borggreve]

Can I aaaaaargggghhhhh with you, Shel? You must live my life at the moment, I feel the exact same way as you do and I could just scream out of pure frustration sometimes....Even my best friends do not seem to understand that I do have a job, that my job might be weird to them, but still...it does matter to me and my collectors and yes....I do pay bills too.... People just think you are playing around, don't they? Asking you when you will get a proper job or commenting on how sad it is that my sister must be the smart one and I am the one that can do things with her hands (thank you very much, I studied Law for crying out loud).

Well, aaaaargggghhhhh for me too Shel, and good for you to get it off your chest. I just argh in my own house and sometimes the comments make me so insecure that I even start wondering myself if I should not just get a ¨proper¨ job, whatever that may be. Every now and then I even start to apply for jobs, but then later find myself running back to my art again.
You go Shelli, I am right behind you on this one, or actually I'll be on the soapbox next to you screaming the same thing!
Ellen ;-)

[Paula]

Sorry Shel, grinning here ... not disrespectfully though, more wryly! How many times have I too ever felt the need to justify what I've chosen to do, even to myself? I hear ya girl! Must dash ... time to submit my tax return - how much more 'real' does it get eh? LOL!!

[Shel]

I knew this would strike a chord with all my artisan friends. Thank you for putting that into words on my blog, via your comments! It helps me move from AARGH to *sigh*, which is a step in a calmer, more resigned (if not quite "accepting") direction. Veronica, your point is well taken; I don't expect change to result from my post. Deaf ears and rigid minds will be what they are. But it did feel good to scream my frustration aloud (Cheryl knew it would!), and who knows? Change IS possible. I'm not holding my breath waiting for it, that's for sure... but I'm ever hopeful. Maybe someday... ?

[Samantha Potter]

Thank you, thank you, thank you for writing so clearly about an issue that is so close to my heart!! I would love to be able to make my bears full time but I constantly hear people saying that it is not a real job!! I will perhaps point a few of them in the direction of your blog!!!
Hugs,
Samanatha
x

[Laura Lynn]

Shel I so understand!!!

Seems if artists who work from home actually had someplace ELSE to go to to do their creating... (open a shop, rent a studio...) then people take them seriously.... cause they "go" to work!

What they don't realize is that working from home is a very good business choice... as overhead is MUCH lower... thus profits are higher.

[Aleta]

Amen, sister!!

I wish I could write as eloquently about these things as you do. Perhaps some in my family would take my "real job" more seriously if I didn't work in my pajamas!! Ha!

Warmest bear hugs, Aleta

[nimbleknot]

Whew! I feel your pain. I had a friend tell me to my face, "You don't have a job so it's not real important if you wake up and eat breakfast since you don't do anything."

Being a stay at home mom of two small kids is a walk in the park. My "friend" works at home and has no kids. He's been laid off twice in the last 2 years. I wanted to stab him.

Well, I for one, always thought of you as a famous bear maker Shelli. And I really felt honored when I got to meet you in person. I always thought, "now there's an artist that has taken her passion and made it her life. I want to do THAT!" People are just jealous that you are doing something you absolutely LOVE and make money at it. That is the key to life and you found it. -Jen

[Tammy]

AMEN !!!! Oh, I feel your frustration too Shelli. Geez, I hate the blank stare I get when I tell people , " I am a bear artist". You can just see them thinking , oh, but do you work ??? You are so right and said it so well !!! Thankfully, there are people/other artists who totally understand your passion and see you for the incredibly talented, hard working artist you are, with a REAL JOB. I hope your vacation ( that your art helped pay for !) was rejuvenating.

Hugs, Tammy

[Tami Eveslage]

This struck such a chord with me as with so many others. I am venturing back in to the world of regular paycheck jobs. I have found a job as a part time art teacher which feels like it will be just perfect for me.(I start in the fall, so time will tell.) I will get to teach ART- to share my greatest passion with wonderful young people-two days per week, nine months out of the year. I will receive a regular (albeit small)paycheck.I will also still have the time to take care of my family's needs and persue my other "soul feeding" work-my bears and dolls! But because the paycheck is small and the hours are short, I STILL have people giving me a qualified congratulations on this."Wow, that is a great start."
"You are still going to keep looking then, aren't you?"
"This will due nicely until you can find something better."
But I keep thinking, "What could be better?"
Luckily, I have a husband who understands and appreciates what I do. I had him read your blog and as he was reading about all you do with your business, he said with admiration, "And she can really write too!" I agree! Thanks for putting to words what so many of us feel!

[Krista Griffiths]

AMEN!!! Shel!!! You go girl! I have been dealing with this for a while now myself, and have almost ended some friendships over "ask Krista to do it, she is home all day!!!" I am home all day working, just like you Shelli and many others as noted above! We have a job, and a very rewarding one at that!!! I do have my hubby though who is my biggest dragon slayer and champion, I think he even gets more offended than I do when people scoff at the work I do!
Thank you so much Shelli for writing this!
Hugs,
Krista