I'm so blessed in my life, but sometimes that life is hard. My mom is grieving the loss of her daughter and I can't really fix it or help with that. My son is being bullied at school. I'm behind on some deadlines and working hard but it's weighing on me and I'm stressed.
Striking me particularly hard today, on top of that stuff, is the stinging reminder that there's a real dark side to the teddy bear industry; one in which people choose to "hate" instead of "celebrate" when it comes to their peers (Ha! I got that great expression from Ali G!). I guess this shouldn't surprise me, human nature being what it is, and given the nature of the "artist temperament." And certainly this isn't particular to the bear industry; I've seen it across every business imaginable. But surprise me it does, and hurt me too a little bit... each and every time.
I'm pretty invested intellectually and emotionally in what I think is a truly great website for arctophiles: a forum called Teddy Talk which, along with a handful of other bearmakers, I essentially "moderate." Mostly I'm just a cheerleader there for all things bruin; Admin handles all the inside, dirty work. I try to apply my enthusiasm evenly and consistently in my role and for the most part, I think I succeed.
Teddy Talk was designed to be a gathering place and a learning place; an online cafe' of sorts where bear makers and lovers could come together and discuss all things bear; hence, the name. Teddy Talk was also intended, from the outset, to be a fantastic supporter of the individual soft sculpture artisan. Even though we're sponsored by a mohair supplier, we're not a commercial site and we strive to keep the posting areas of the site commercial free for that reason. Rather, we're a community classroom. Any posting policies at Teddy Talk reflect this mission & purpose.
The forum has a few, really basic and common sense rules in place which we hope encourage participation and maintain an atmosphere of community and safety, while keeping chaos and adversity at bay. Be kind and respectful to others. Handle your private affairs privately. Pay for your banner advertising. Really common sense, mundane, every day, get-along-with-others stuff like that which keeps things fair. These rules are available in expanded form to those who need or want more details, but in simplest form, that's the entirety of our "rulebook" on the forum.
In the history of the forum, we've never once removed a member for rule breaking -- even when, quite possibly, we should have. We've given participants every chance to "recover" from lapses in conduct because we're human, and they're human, and misunderstandings occur, especially online where there's no context or visual cues to aid understanding. We all make teddy bears, after all; so there's some squishy space during hard times for a bit of softness, and we try to live that philosophy, too.
The payoff for abiding by what might be the online world's most common sense rules -- for playing nice in the Teddy Talk sandbox (which is such a small and easy thing to do) -- is nothing short of huge for the bear maker and bear collector:
-- There's no need to register to read our site content. Our information is openly available to all. Nowadays for every 10 people online, we have about 30 guest visitors who aren't registered or logged in.
-- You can post a huge avatar at our site -- among the largest on the web -- and it can include your contact information and pictures of your work. It's a terrific free marketing tool for your business; every time you post, your avatar keeps you and your work "top of mind" with forum readers.
-- We've provided a quick "form" you can fill out in 60 seconds or less which will auto-insert your (1) eBay seller ID, (2) website; (3) eMail; (4) Blog; and (5) Private Messaging information under your avatar, making it incredibly easy for TT readers to find you at every spot where you post on the forum, without ever having to "look you up." Another great free marketing tool, and you don't need to know html or php to use it.
-- You can create a text signature with links to your original work. Not all sites allow signatures.
-- We've provided two places on the forum that are 100% dedicated to pictures of your work. One is intended for work you're selling, and the other is intended for work you're just showing off. Collectors visit our site and browse these areas, looking for items of interest. This catalog of great bears, all in one place, and entirely free to you, has been a remarkable part of many a bearmakers business growth and success.
-- We've got an enormous library of bear related topics, from the specifics of teddy construction to information on photography, auction sites, and web design... all of which assist the individual bearmaker in developing his or her business to its fullest potential. And again, this is free and available to all.
-- For those wanting additional exposure at Teddy Talk, we offer banner advertising opportunities. It's incredibly cheap (a mere $20 for a six month run; too cheap if you ask me) and the small revenue earned goes not to forum Advisors or Admin or our sponsor, but to our technical support guy, Quy, who is an absolute genius and incredibly helpful... and who VOLUNTEERS the considerable time he spends at Teddy Talk, working to make the forum functional and pretty. Ad revenue is his only direct compensation for all he does at TT.
-- Our collector visitors can browse the work of their favorite artists with ease, and have ready access to those artists via PM, eMail, or by posting right to the forum.
-- And there's just so, so, so much more!
Over the years, there have of course been people who didn't see or value that payoff; people who simply couldn't, for whatever reason, be happy abiding by the forum's common sense rules. As a forum TT has tried to be interesting to and workable for all, but of course we can't be that -- no entity can -- and there will be
people for whom the forum just doesn't "work." We understand completely when folks take their online time
elsewhere, whether for a moment or for eternity. And to our credit, I think, we continue to be genuinely in support of all
things bear... even when those things transpire at what might be
perceived as a "competing" website somewhere else in cyber space.
We don't expect people who visit TT to visit TT exclusively, forming alliances with our forum which exclude alliances with other websites. Heck... I buy Edinburgh mohair (it's lovely), visit Beary Cheap's forum to lurk and learn (they're funny and talented), and have placed BAO not once, but twice, on my POTBELLY ARTS links page (it's a great concept and I wish it success.)
It's never even occurred to us at Teddy Talk that, in order to be helpful to bear lovers, or to provide a great place to talk bears, we need to be the only game in town. We've never once considered, publicly or privately, acting in ways which undermine other bear sites so that we could garner some kind of market share for ourselves and eliminate the competition in doing so. We really are a group of folks trying to the best of our abilities to keep the bear industry, and the artisans and collectors at the core of it, ALIVE and WELL, and we're doing this, entirely on a volunteer basis, by genuinely supporting ALL.
You'd think that people would readily see the genuineness of those volunteer efforts, and hopefully that they'd appreciate them on some level, whether expressed aloud or not, as well. You'd think that those who feel constrained by the rules at TT would choose to simply stop visiting our forum. I know that when something chafes at me, I find the easiest solution is to extricate myself from the object that's chafing me and try something different, moving on, and discarding what didn't work.
I love and have worked soo hard in my own small way to build Teddy Talk into something great that actually helps other people and brings them together over a common interest. My personal belief and approach as I've volunteered my time at the forum has always been that it's better to HAVE each other's backs than to STAB each other's backs. Such a philosophy just makes plain good sense to me, in the bear industry... and in life.
That's why in my heart of hearts I don't at all understand why it's being reported today that a couple of people -- people who frequently participate at Teddy Talk -- are publicly mocking the forum and those of us who caretake it, delighting in their self-described "sneaky" misuse of forum features. The misuse itself isn't a problem at all, actually. Who cares? Rather, it's the spiteful giddiness with which these folks describe tricking or "using" Teddy Talk, the forum, that makes hearing this report so painful and confusing.
I have to assume these folks don't realize that we designed and caretake the forum for them, to assist their success.. TT provides tools for learning and marketing and sales, and they're provided for free -- unlike some sites, where you must pay for your exposure, inclusion and image privileges. And in return for that gift -- and it is a gift -- Teddy Talk deserves sabotage and mockery???
For a select few, apparently the TT forum has become a big ol' bad guy and a target. I'm telling you, though... I can't imagine why. Other than the occasional reminder when things get wonky that we have certain guidelines for forum use -- and how irksome can that possibly be? Every other forum also has rules, as do most institutions and public venues -- the forum has done nothing but accept bear lovers into its folds with warm welcome, continually developing new features to help them either make bears; sell bears; or buy bears.
I'm also left to wonder whether these folks have considered, for even one moment, that an international audience -- including their own collectors -- has access to their words in the place where they were originally posted. That audience will form opinions and they might not be good or flattering ones. These folks are on record now, on the web, internationally, celebrating their own pettiness and "sneak"iness or that of others, for reasons only they understand. I don't. 99.99% of the world won't. Have these folks given any thought at all to the impact such comments might have on their personal and professional lives???
It all just makes me so heartsick and sad. Not angry and certainly not retaliatory; just terribly, terrifically sad. It seems so pointless and unnecessary to jab with hostility when we could instead be embracing one another as artists and cross-marketing our businesses in ways that help EVERYONE succeed and feel supported.
The Teddy Talk forum has done nothing but support the individual artisan and bear related businesses of all kinds -- suppliers big and small; auction sites; showcase sites; promoters; and graphic designers. While we don't allow banner ads to be posted except in advertising areas, we freely allow -- even encourage! -- members to mention their affiliations and partnerships; published articles and photographs; website updates; and resources & suppliers in the posting areas of our site. Honestly, can somebody please tell me... what on earth could be so objectionable about that?
There may be some who don't care for the particular ways in which we've done all that; people who don't like our look or style or content. I frequently get the idea that I, personally, piss people off on a regular basis by simply being myself (articulate and long winded; we can't all be concise!) But I'm a good person and I can only be who I am if I'm acting genuinely, so I offer my apologies to those of you whom I annoy. It's not my intent.
Mostly, the larger point is that Teddy Talk has tried valiantly and earnestly to be a true help and assist in this industry, and in fact has done great things for the visibility of the very people who are now mocking it! That assist, that effort on the part of the forum to be a meaningful instrument of free, willing, genuine support for bear lovers, can't and shouldn't be ignored. It hurts my heart that the earnestness and sincerity of our efforts -- and by "our" I mean Advisors, Admin, and the people who make Teddy Talk what it is; the readers and participants -- is being overlooked or forgotten as people focus instead on spoiling opportunities and spreading mean spirited gossip. Forum communities are so delicately balanced even on good days. So the fact that a few are purposefully and maliciously rubbing their hands together while trying to upset the apple cart leaves me feeling pretty hopeless and sad inside.
Things will get better. They always do. Teddy Talk is solid and strong and frankly, huge and growing. But this is the state of my head today. It's been temporarily fogged over by The Dark Side.
